Last night in Los Angeles, Jennifer Aniston and Aaron Eckhart did the walk of shame at the premiere of that piece of shit movie Love Happens. Or as my mom accidentally calls it, Love Herpes. Or as the rest of us purposely call it, Love Happens....To Everyone But Jennifer Aniston.

Save yourself the $12 and just watch a mash-up of a Tasters Choice commercial and Celine Dion's "When I Fall In Love" video on a loop. You will crawl away with the same dead sensation in your crotch.

I know that IN THIS ECONOMY, a check is a check, but when is Jennifer Aniston going to quit doing shit like this and finally do a sequel to the masterpiece that is Picture Perfect. Yes, I have to watch the entire thing whenever it comes on TBS. And I always hate myself for it.